Thursday, December 21, 2006
solstice
yesterday was the solstice. its still is to me as i havent gone to bed yet. its been a rather bleak emotional time, appropriate considering it is the longest night of the year. i have so much in my head, so many emotions in my heart. i feel torn in some ways. i am torn between emotion and logic, a place i intensely dislike being in yet often find myself. i wish that my head and heart wouldnt struggle so. it was easier when my head ruled everything. then, i just walked away from things and didnt look back. then i rediscovered my emotions in my late late twenties, and its been hell ever since. and the older i get, the stronger the emotions get.
my heart has been breaking today.
i am looking to the light of the new year.
lou
About Me
- loula
- restless & dreaming... i spend most of my time torn between fairyland & cold hard logic. i believe in dreams. i believe in magic. i believe in predestination & self determination. i believe we can recreate ourselves. i believe that we are powerful beyond imagination. i believe in alternate realities & planes of existence. i believe in you. i believe in me. i believe that almost everyone in the world is a good person in their heart. i believe that we as a society make bad people, they are not born that way. i believe in not giving up. i believe that most things can be proven, that most times there is a logical answer to everything. i believe. sometimes, i need to hide away to allow my soul to reconnect. sometimes, i skip & dance & try to share the beauty that i see in the world with everyone around me. sometimes, i cry. sometimes, i cry for other people i do not know. sometimes, i cry for those i do know. sometimes, i cry for myself. i believe. *** may beauty be in your life. loula
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